The Microwave Society: Lack of Communication

We live in a society where everything has to be instant like microwave food or instant messaging.
We have so many communication devices and yet our communication is worsening more and more with each other. If you don't reply fast, they get angry. In a traffic light if you don't put the pedal instantly, they honk you. If you don't decide something at a restaurant, the waiter will have an attitude with you. If you don't... and the list goes on.
What is then what we are aiming for? You feel more stressed, emptier and you think, what am I aiming for? Why are my relationships worsening?
Remember when life was without social media? Maybe you were born into it. Dinners were without phones; people will engage in conversations without taking pictures or URGENTLY answering a text or a call.
Now the obsession of this microwave society is out of control. And it has setback the interpersonal communication and the ability to have sane relationships.
It seems I am a pessimistic, but in my years of counseling and coaching, I have found that is the main problem.
I have seen families going into pieces because they have lost touch with interpersonal communication. I see more and more people at a dinner table where everyone is with a phone and the art of communication is lost. I have seen adolescents that take advice from terrible sources on the internet.
How can we solve this?
It seems hopeless sometimes when individuals come to my practice and tell me how they feel and cannot mend their relationships. BUT all is not lost. Actually, is very easy to fix.
Let me give you a tip.
When you don't know how to communicate with someone,
- Find something from that person that is real for them. How to do this? You actually observe what the person likes, what are his/her interests, what they use or anything the person considers it's real for them.
- Engage in a friendly conversation with the person about that thing you found. Listen to the person and put your attention on what is saying. Don't look at your phone or interrupt. Be really interested.
- Acknowledge what the person is saying without judgement or criticism.
- Treat the other person how you would like to be treated.
You will see how miraculous the conversation and attitude changes. Then the person will have affection for you or will be kinder with you.
Try this and you will have more enjoyment and livelihood to your life.

